kidmercury

The technology blogosphere has been going on and on about this post from Jason Calacanis, in which the entrepreneur-turned-liar gives us all advice on how to build a startup.

Now, readers of this blog are well aware of the fact that Jason Calacanis is a liar. And so, as is the case with all liars, his words are meaningless; after all, that is the way he has chosen to make them.


The good news, though, is that we can still learn how to build a successful startup from Jason. We just need to ignore his words -- because, as we've repeatedly proven, he is a liar -- and just pay attention to his actions.

So, here are the lessons I've learned from Jason:

1. Don't buy tradeable assets that will depreciate quickly. Jason has a tendency to open his mouth and publicly reveal his stupidity on a somewhat regular basis, as evidenced by his frequent posts on what he says is an economic bubble we're experiencing in the Internet/technology sector. What Jason doesn't realize is that the bubble isn't in Internet business companies being overvalued; it's in the US dollar being overvalued (Jason is also using the term "bubble" incorrectly, but most people do that, and I think we all get the gist of what he is trying to say, so I'll play along and use his words). In other words, Facebook's valuation at $15 billion doesn't mean Facebook is overvalued; it means the US dollar is overvalued, and thus $15 billion USD just ain't worth what it used to be.

Now, because Jason doesn't understand this simple but hugely important concept, he went out and raised $16 million to start his little web directory. Crunchbase reports that Jason raised the money in January of 2007.

In January of 2007, 1 US dollar bought you about 0.766 euros. Today, 1 US dollar buys you about 0.651 euros. A drop of about 15%.

Jason raised all that money thinking it was going to last him a while. But a falling dollar brings about higher prices, which we are already seeing. So that money is going to disappear a lot faster than Jason would like.

The lesson Jason's stupidity has taught us? Don't buy tradeable assets that will depreciate quickly. And if you're going to talk endlessly about a bubble, you might want to learn what that actually means.

Of course, the real kicker is that if Jason was mature enough to understand the truth about 9/11 and how he has a responsibility to publish the truth about it, he might understand how 9/11 and the completely unjustified wars that have been started in its wake are the real cause of the dollar's devaluation, and the real cause of why all that money he raised is only going to fall in value.

2. Morale isn't built up; it's filtered down. Jason took a lot of heat for writing that he wants workaholics only to work at building his 1997-style web directory. I actually agree with this sentiment; I only want to work with workaholics too. But the problem is that people will only be workaholics when (1) they are inspired by a leader and/or cause and (2) they see a big personal benefit. Since Mahalo is all about paying slave wages to their content contributors while keeping the publishing rights to themselves (instead of giving content contributors ownership, or using a CC license), it is unlikely content contributors will see a big enough personal benefit to justify being workaholics. As for Jason being a leader who inspires.....LOL. Okay. Liars never inspire. Lying is a cowardly thing to do, and being a coward is quite possibly the least inspirational thing one can do.

Where Should You Go for Real Startup Advice?

Everyone and their dog in the technology blogosphere seemed to chime in on Jason's post. Of course, for real startup advice, ya'll need to check out my man Marc Andreessen's guide to startups (you can find the startup posts in the "top posts" area on the right side of Marc's blog). Marc tells the truth, brings a billion dollar game (actually, multiple billion dollar games), and drops knowledge like you wouldn't believe. Now there's a real leader!

But I know many of you are not ready for the kind of Truth that Marc brings. So here are some posts in response to Jason about startup advice.

Venture Chronicles: People Costs vs. Stuff Costs (read this one!)
Zennie2005: Jason Calacanis ' "How To Save Money Running A Startup " Misses Mark ...
Ryan Spoon: Mark Cuban Chimes in on Jason Calacanis ’s Start Up Rules
InstigatorBlog: Should You Hire Workaholics For Your Startup ?
Sugar Rae: Good Financial Advice for Startups or Why Calacanis is Right
Don Dodge: How to make your startup successful
Duncan Riley: Calacanis Fires People Who Have A Life
Texas Startup Blog: Startup Advice Roundup
A VC: Startup Advice Weekend

Coming Soon: Music About Jason Calacanis

I'm almost done with a song about Jason, which will be incorporated into the Jason Calacanis Game. Since this is web 2.0, don't worry: it's not so much my song as it is OUR song, so you'll have your chance to participate in the fun as well!

In the mean time, I'll leave you all with a song that should be running through our heads everytime we see Jason. It's called "I Can See a Liar," by Oasis.

Enjoy.


(Or, if you're not into Oasis [an indication of bad taste, but no worries, I forgive you], another appropriate song would be "I Don't Believe You" by the Magnetic Fields. Killer tune.)